Comparison can be dangerous and most of the time I would advise against comparing yourself with anyone. God designed and created each and every one of us individually. (Psalms 139). He put in each and every person gifts, abilities and characteristics that mix together and make us uniquely us!  However, there are times when we see qualities in others that we recognize in ourselves. Some good and some bad that can spur us into action or a desire to grow or change. Personally, I have friends who are much more hospitable and merciful, they can always find the good in others. I struggle here! I often joke that I was absent the day God handed out mercy. It’s not something that comes naturally to me. But seeing it lived out by others gives me a desire to grow that in myself. Not a bad thing, unless the comparison becomes sinful. Likewise, when I see others losing their patience, being overly harsh or judgemental – it often convicts me of that same sin in my life. 

If you follow me at all, you know I’ve spent most of the summer in the book of John. I have to be honest and say, I’ll likely be here for several more months! Reading and studying the words and life of Jesus is so rich and rewarding. I learn something new every day! Which brings me to my point today. John 13:1-20 is the story of the last supper when Jesus washes the feet of His disciples. You all likely know the story well, we’ve heard and read it countless times. This week however, it took on new meaning for me. Let me see if I can explain. 

Have you ever tried to put yourself in the scene of the last supper? Think about which character you would have been? How you would  have reacted when Jesus bent down to wash your feet? Truth is we don’t know how many of them reacted, only the few mentioned in scripture. So, it’s possible you may identify mostly with the unnamed disciples who apparently sat quietly and just watched the scene unfold, taking it all in, listening and learning. Personally, I’ve always thought I would have been right there with Peter – I tend to speak and jump before thinking things through and counting the cost/evaluating if it makes sense or not. And I love that the gospels include Peter’s failures and faults so that we can learn and grow through them. 

Beginning in verse 6 Peter questions Jesus and His actions, not wanting the Messiah to lower Himself to such a menial task. Peter says (my paraphrase)  “Umm, nope. Not happening Jesus, this is beneath you”. Jesus replies “Dude, just let me do it, it will make sense in time. Trust me. If you don’t let me do this, then you have NO PART WITH ME”.  Those last few words, the second part of verse 8 “Jesus replied, “If I don’t wash you, you have no part with me.”. Completely broke me deeply this past week! 

This past week was so very hard for me personally. It shouldn’t have been. It was a good week. One in which God answered some big prayers for my family. But as 1 Peter 5:8 says “Be sober-minded, be alert. Your adversary the devil is prowling around like a roaring lion, looking for anyone he can devour.” The enemy saw an opening, a sin I thought I’d fully dealt with, snuck in, attacked and took me down hard! Anger is a sin I’ve struggled with my entire life. Jesus has been working on me in this area for years. Most of the time, I’m able to keep it in check, but this week was different and it came out in a way I quite frankly am embarrassed and ashamed of. I hurt people I deeply love and care about with my words and choices. I was so ashamed, I didn’t even want to talk with God about it! I didn’t feel I deserved His forgiveness or anyone else’s. 

BUT GOD, in His infinite kindness and gentleness took me back to this passage in John 13. As I read the words, I could picture Jesus sitting there across from me saying “Lori, are you gonna give me your feet or not? I want to wash them for you, but the choice is yours.” His words, so gentle, just like He was with Peter “I know you’re gonna mess up, that is WHY I’m here! I want you to do life WITH me but unless you give me your (fill in the blank, for me it was fear that came out in the form of anger) and trust me with it, you can’t. So what do you say, are you ready for me to wash your feet or not?” 

As you can imagine the tears flowed hard, deep and long! It was a much needed submission on my part as I allowed Jesus to take my fear, shame, embarrassment and anger,the  hurt and pride and wash them all away, like only He can. The whole experience has been extremely humbling. I’m not foolish enough to believe it’s over and I’ll never struggle with this again, although it’s possible because nothing is too hard or big for God. But regardless, I KNOW Jesus will be waiting for me because He wants the best for me and that means going through life following Him every single second of every single day! He wants the same for you! 

So, let me leave you with just one question – do you need to give your feet to Jesus today so that He can wash your (fear, anger, striving, jealousy, embarrassment, control, comparison, lust, etc…)  away? Why not let Him, right here and right now? I promise you, you won’t regret it!