I’ve been struggling to find the motivation to write lately.  And if I’m honest with myself, the last few things I’ve written have not been that great.  Unfortunately, I also know why. This was not something I came to on my own, even though I wish that it was. It’s something that God allowed me to see and understand. Conviction is a hard thing. Being confronted with your sin is never easy, but when it’s something you know you struggle with and fall into its trap yet again, it’s painful. The only thing that can get us through these times is God and Him alone. His word tells us “His mercies are new every morning”. While I have found that to be true, I have also discovered that you have to come to a place where you willing to let the God of all; comfort you and carry you through those times of failure and disobedience. 

I never planned on being a blogger or a writer. In fact I grew up hating to read! So for me to wind up in a place where I not only love to read and learn, but to also write things for others to read is a clear indication that this is not my idea or plan, but Gods. When I first began writing it was more for my own clarity than anything else. I’m sad to say, it took many, many years and a lot of encouragement to give journaling a try. You see I’m pretty easily distracted and when I discovered journaling actually helped me focus and process what I was reading and learning I was hooked. Journaling and the learning that came with it, turned into a deep desire to share what I was learning and how God was growing me with those around. One thing led to another and now here we are. Again, this is not me or something I ever thought I’d be willing to do, let alone actually do. Another thing about me that is important to know is that I have a deep struggle with pride. I want to appear as though I have “it” all together, I hate asking for help and will avoid it all costs, and just forget about admitting my failures and being completely open, honest and vulnerable with even those closet to me. I share all of this to make it clear (maybe even to myself still) that my writing comes from God’s leading and prompting alone! 

That struggle with pride is actually what leads to my writing today. When I created this blog I thought long and hard about the purpose behind it. After much thought and prayer, I landed on the name “For the Glory” and even stated that my purpose was to bring glory to God. Somewhere along the line, I forgot that goal and purpose. I started writing for myself and the things it brought me. I hate pride! My writing became forced. There are countless pieces that sit unfinished because of this. The few things shared recently, have been a huge struggle to get to a place worth sharing. And even then, somewhere deep inside I knew I was writing out of obligation and an effort to kick start myself once again, more than being led by God. I lost my way and forgot that this journey is not one of my choosing, but Gods. I took my eyes and heart off him and placed them on myself. Did I mention that I hate pride! 

That brings us here today. Another true confession, this is not what I was planning on writing when I opened up the laptop this morning. But clearly, God wanted me to come clean with you all first. Going back to the original plan and purpose, this is for God’s glory alone. My hope and prayer is that if you struggle with the sin of pride, you will be encouraged to know you are not alone! The struggle is real, but so is our God! He lives inside us and He alone can defeat this enemy we have. Psalms 23:1-3 “The Lord is my shepherd; I have what I need. He lets me lie down in green pastures; he leads me beside quiet waters. He renews my life; he leads me along the right paths for his name’s sake.” Rest in those words today. Truly let them soak deep into your soul. Think, journal and pray about what they really mean and what God is telling you. God is leading you- He is your shepherd, just like He is mine. Do you need to rest in Him- do it. He is the one leading you to those places and times of rest. Notice that last part about renewal and course correction –”he renews my life and leads me along right paths”. And then comes the why “For His name’s sake”– For His Glory!