It was early morning, one of my favorite times. The house is quiet, the rooms were still dark, the sun hasn’t even begun to show its face yet. On this morning I was distracted, my mind filled with hundreds of thoughts about what needed to get done later that day.  A few days earlier I had been encouraged to listen more in my prayer time. Which is a hard thing when you think about it, since most of us think of praying as telling God what we need or want. But I had been feeling somewhat disconnected from God lately, so I was trying to be quiet and just listen. Remembering an exercise my counselor taught me to relax and fully pay attention to where I was, how I felt, what I heard and smelled- I sat quietly for a while and tried to pay attention.

It was dark, the only light coming from the lamp next to me. Birds were chipping just outside my window. I held a warm cup of coffee in my cold hands, which smelled heavenly (Seriously, there is nothing quite like the smell of freshly brewed coffee in the morning!). It was a cool morning, but I was warm with a soft blanket covering me. It was peaceful. I was repeatedly tempted to set down my coffee and grab my devotional and journal, because doing is much more comfortable than sitting quietly and listening. But something or someone rather held me right there just listening.

After a long while, I grabbed my devotional and read 1 John 2:15-17 “Do not love the world or the things in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him. ¹⁶ For everything in the world—the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride in one’s possessions—is not from the Father, but is from the world. ¹⁷ And the world with its lust is passing away, but the one who does the will of God remains forever.”.

A series of questions followed these verses asking who or what do you love more – Jesus or this world and things it provides? It didn’t take long for me to understand my love was misplaced on this world. I desperately wanted to grab my journal and begin writing, but God kept me sitting and just listening and thinking about what he had just revealed to me.

Just thinking about my week and how busy it had been proved his point, making my misplaced love crystal clear. I had been rushing him, multitasking him and checking him off the list, instead of truly engaging in our relationship, listening to him and allowing him to fill me up with himself. God’s love is so pure and unconditional, while mine is impure and extremely conditional.

By this time my family was waking up and I begin to hear other noises; the shower being turned on, doors opening and closing, dishes clanging together as breakfast and lunches were being made, electric toothbrushes, etc.. My normal thought when these sounds begin intruding on my quiet time is one of frustration and a tinge of irritation. But today I was thankful, thankful that I had a home where all these sounds seem so normal, and that I have a family surrounding me making these noises, that there are jobs and school to attend which is why they were awake and making noise. This new thought, already showing a shift in my perspective.

My reading next took me to Matthew 6:24-34– the worry passage. Once again I struggled to simply sit quietly, listening and reflecting. The urge to “do” increasingly strong. Thankfully God stopped me as He began to make a connection in my mind. As I sat and listened, I began to understand how these verses on worry tie perfectly to the verses in 1 John. You see, it’s my love of the world and what it gives me that create most if not all of my worry and anxiety.

God brought another story to mind. It’s found in Luke 10:38-42, it’s about two sisters, Mary and Martha. Martha who is more focused on getting things done instead of stopping to fully engage and listen to Jesus (Ouch!), verses Mary who was focused on Jesus, sitting at his feet and listening, with her love rightly placed and pure. A familiar story, but today it brought more clarity than before. Martha was still trying to earn her place and impress others, while Mary was doing the more important-loving Jesus. My attitude and motives are naturally more like Martha, and if I’m honest usually are entirely self-serving. It takes effort and intention for me to be more like Mary and sit at the feet of Jesus.

Another thing I noticed as the world began to wake up –those birds that seemed so loud were now harder to hear. They were still just outside the window and still chirping, but in order to hear them I had to be quiet and really pay attention in order to hear them through the noises the world was beginning to make. As the sun began to rise it was clear what Jesus was saying to me – “I’m always right here, and I do speak. If you will just stop and pay closer attention you will hear me through the noise of the world.” I love that Jesus uses normal life to teach! As my day went on, I heard birds chirping occasional, each time reminding me that Jesus was right there too. Reminding me to make time and space, tuning my ears to him. For me, that means intentional stopping, listening and just being with Jesus. No agenda, just purposeful sitting at his feet.

1 Timothy is a letter from Paul to Timothy, in chapter 3 there is a list of qualifications to be a leader in the church. While Paul is talking specifically about church roles, I believe there is a lesson here for each of us who considers ourself a leader. Look at verse 15 and the “so that” statement it brings- “But if I should be delayed, I have written so that you will know how people ought to conduct themselves in God’s household, which is the church of the living God, the pillar and foundation of the truth.” Did you catch it? Let me paraphrase it for you “You church leader are called to a higher standard, one that others will look to as an example. The church is God’s house and it is the foundation of his gospel”.

People- the church (I’m talking big “C” church) is meant to draw others to Jesus, of course we should look different than the world and it all begins with love and having our first love be Jesus! We must say no to loving the world and all that it offers and lures to want. We must say no to busyness and more and trying to outshine others. Sure there is work to be done, but we must make time to listen to the One calling us to do the work! Sitting at the feet of Jesus is where real life happens!